Oliver’s Extraordinary Friend: A Boy’s Journey of Embracing Autism by Andrea Mercier
Review by Angie Carlson
Different doesn’t have to be scary — so begins a powerful conversation between Oliver and his mother about his new friend, Gabriel. You see, Gabriel has autism (also known as autism spectrum disorder), and Oliver is unsure what that means.
Oliver’s Extraordinary Friend: A Boy’s Journey of Embracing Autism is a deep dive into the realities and benefits of befriending a neurodivergent individual like Gabriel. At first, Oliver finds himself in a somewhat unbalanced friendship, and he doesn’t understand why. In fact, some of Gabriel’s behaviors frustrate him greatly.
After Oliver’s mom explains what autism is and how it affects Gabriel, Oliver is able to approach the friendship with greater patience and understanding.
Parents and educators will agree that from an early age, children are taught the art of balance in friendships – share your toys, offer a snack, take turns – while befriending someone with autism may mean finding a new balance, one that requires a level of love and patience beyond the norm.
Mercier illustrates Gabriel’s unique way of experiencing the world through real-life examples to help readers identify what neurodivergence in others might look like, such as physical soothing through rocking, covering ears, or avoiding eye contact.
While aspects of autism vary across the spectrum, Mercier shows that common ground can be found between friends as they nurture what they have in common versus dwelling on what they don’t — an excellent talking point for grown-ups reading this book to children.
As Oliver navigates the friendship, his love and support for Gabriel grows. Soon, Oliver begins anticipating Gabriel’s needs at a higher level and clears the path for his friend’s overall well-being. For example, when Gabriel begins showing signs of overwhelm (which can lead to an emotional meltdown), Oliver steps into action, making a blanket fort so his friend can safely regroup.
Readers learn that a little patience goes a long way, and where discomfort once was, acceptance and adaptation remain. To further support parents and educators, Mercier includes discussion questions and end pages about autism and sensory seeking, as well as additional resources.
This book is highly recommended for elementary school grade levels, where children will engage with neurodivergent peers for the first time. Oliver’s Extraordinary Friend is honest and authentic, a book to spark vital conversations with kids about being inclusive and understanding of their peers with autism.
Resources to learn more about autism:
Author Andrea Mercier’s story is one of advocacy, compassion, and inspiration. Already a military wife and minister, Andrea’s journey took an unexpected turn when she became an autism mom to her beautiful son, Gabriel. His extraordinary spirit spurred Andrea to pen Oliver’s Extraordinary Friend, her debut children’s book. Through her heartfelt storytelling, Andrea aims to bridge the gap between neurotypical and uniquely-abled children to foster understanding and acceptance. Her experiences as a speaker and advocate help her spread awareness and initiate vital conversations about autism within families and communities.